The biker

Piccole letture in chiave umoristica e/o filosofica

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There I was, sitting at the bar, staring at my drink, when a large biker grabbed my drink and swallowed it down in one swig.
“Well, what are you going do about it?” asked the biker menacingly as I burst into tears.
“This is the worst day of my life,” I replied, sobbing. “I’m a complete failure. I was late to a meeting this morning and my boss fired me. When I went to the car park, I found that my car had been stolen and I don’t have any insurance against theft. I left my wallet in the taxi that I took to get back home. When I finally did get home, I found my wife with another man and as I was kicking him out of the house, my dog bit me. So I came to this bar to to put an end to it all. I bought myself a drink, dropped some poison in, and was just sitting here watching it dissolve when you came in and swallowed the whole lot down.
“But that’s enough of me. How’s your day going?”

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At the restaurant

Piccole letture in chiave umoristica e/o filosofica

Perché non provi inizialmente ad ascoltare l’audio senza leggere il testo?

Per sapere il significato delle parole evidenziate, passaci sopra con il mouse senza cliccare.

One evening, at a hotel restaurant, a man noticed a pretty young woman sitting alone at the next table.
Suddenly the woman sneezed violently and her glass eye popped out and flew across the room. Deftly, the man snatched it from the air and gallantly handed it back to the young woman.
“Oh dear, how terribly embarrassing,” murmured the young woman as she slipped the eye back into its socket. “I’m so sorry to have disturbed you. Would you like to join me for dinner?”
The man agreed and sat down at the woman’s table.
Not only was the woman extremely attractive, she was also excellent company and the two of them found that they had a lot in common.
Towards the end of the evening, the man asked the woman for her phone number and said, “You really are such a delightful person. Are you so friendly to every man you meet?”
“No,” she replied, “you just happened to catch my eye.”

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